No matter how many arms wrap lovingly around me I still feel alone.
All last week my face hurt
Not from smiling
The ever predators
I know I am loved
I have been blessed with many wonderful friends and family members
Everything seems to be going so well....
A good job
All the things I dreamed of
So what is this terror?
I seem to stand always on the brink
The feeders in the shadows slip under my doorframe
Sucking at my happiness
The image in the mirror
For me to fail
For all of it to disappear
For me to wake up and be that scared little girl again
Hated for being different
Snippets of their comments float to the surface
"You can't have everything"
"You are a reasonable girl, you know you'll never be famous"
Or worth anything?
"Spoiled little bitch" he said
Funny thing is I worked for it
All of it
None of the things have came easily to me
Or were handed to me
But nobody sees it that way
They don't know me or my past
I am not practical
Or any of the things they think I am
I am a dreamer
All the things the world would collapse without
Yet refuse to value today
They value us when it is too late
Maybe if I hadn't tried so hard I would not fear losing it all.